Paradise with a twist

The Ko Lanta to Krabi ferry was as packed as ever but this time baggage belonging to some Spanish tourists had been "mislaid" when it came to disembarking for Ko Jum.  They had apparently left their bags in the wrong area and all their luggage was now hidden under mountains of bags bound for Krabi with no chance of seeing daylight until the final destination.  Nervous and disbelieving they boarded the long tail with promises that their luggage would be delivered later that day.  As the long tail drew closer to the island Matt and I were beaming, paradise was looming towards us...and we had clothes to wear!

Settling in over the next couple of days we went through our 'paradise' checklist: 

Beautiful scenery - tick

Clean, comfortable and private accommodation - tick

White sand beach - tick

Tourquoise sea - tick 

Temperature above 27 degrees - tick

Blue sky - tick

Quiet and serene - tick

Amazing sunsets - tick

Absence of loud obnoxious Brits/any nationality - FAIL!!

On the afternoon of day two we were meandering down to the beach after a little luncheon when a couple weaved towards us.  The man (aka Carl) was bellowing, in a deep but intensely loud voice, to the woman (aka Chelsea or Chelse) who was giggling and stumbling across the sand.  Poor Matt was in the direct path of Carl and there was no escape.  Before you know it pleasantries and nationalities were exchanged and the added knowledge that both Matt and Carl were from Southampton, how lovely.  The next hour produced an onslaught of names and people that Matt had or hadn't known during his teenage and college days.  I meanwhile was making polite chit chat with Chelse from Essex whilst paddling in the sea and trying desperately to make eye contact with Matt and drum up a rescue plan.  I won't go into too much detail but to give a hint at the next few days, from waking Carl constantly held and drank from bottles of white wine whilst on the beach, at their bungalow (joys of joys also next to ours) or whilst walking around the island...at the same time as talking to Chelse regardless of where she was on the island or how near.  Both gradually progressed through the day to stumbling and shouting until reaching 6pm when they continued at warp factor in the beach bar.  Their grand finale had to be the day Carl decided to 'host a MASSIVE party' and not only distributed fliers advertising the night's activities including fireworks and "bring your own drugs" but visited every bungalow and newcomer to ensure attendance...escape was futile.  I almost wet myself laughing as a couple fresh off the boat were greeted by Carl, tattooed and on his 4th bottle of wine, inviting them to the MASSIVE party...expecting quiet and tranquility I saw the whites of their eyes at the prospect of being captive on an island with Carl.  About 25 people turned up for the 'party' which actually turned out to be a really nice way of chatting to other hostages and an early departure meant we just had to hear Carl and Chelsea on the homeward bound antics...whenever that was in the morning.

All in all Ko Jum was indeed amazing, wildlife in abundance, stunning scenery and the essence of paradise in the making.  Ultimately, all we could do was laugh at Carl and Chelsea's antics, steal quiet moments and grab a very early long tail transfer to make our escape and head for Melbourne.